Alright, so I have this thing where I tend to look up stuff that I am thinking about, and one of those thoughts was a search for any real details regarding success. Maybe I was not looking properly or I typed my questions wrong. I did not find any statistics or studies, but I did find something interesting.

After a few different way of rewording my search, I decided to ask my search engine of choice, “How do we define a successful life if we do not have a standard to base anything on?” This next part is what I got; and yes, I am writing about it because I agree with it.

“Without a set standard, a successful life is defined by living a life that aligns with your own personal values, goals, and aspirations, where you feel fulfilled and content with your choices, regardless of external societal expectations; essentially, it means actively pursuing what brings you meaning and happiness on your own terms.”

I have mentioned this at least once before, your success can only be measured by you, and no one else. I am far from the motivational type, and if you need inspiration, I hope you find it elsewhere; however, if you want to reflect with me upon something that even an unintuitive AI software finds to be true, you might be in the right place.

A Type of Context

If this is the first time you have read anything I have written, you should know that my philosophical views lean toward objectivism. If you want to hold that against me, you should also know that I admire creativity in all its forms and that I am not so much attached to learning, knowledge, and understanding as I am to the namkuzu that comes with it. (Namkuzu is a Sumerian word that represents multiple words in English like wisdom, skill, intelligence, cleverness, expertise, or knowledge.)

My imagination supplies me with the idea that namkuzu could be the perfect foundation for the origin story of any hero or villain, but I am more than happy to say that my imagination stays within the bounds of the stories I write. If there is any amount of wisdom that I have gained through my years on this earth is that the majority of what you can do has a lot to do with what is going on in your mind.

Mind over Matter

Yes, this is me diving into the philosophical end of the pool, but I will not be going too deep. The phrase, mind over matter is not just some saying to urge people to achieve above and beyond themselves; it is a short-form equation that expresses the experience that is life on a moment-by-moment scale.

In this equation, the word mind represents an individual’s perspective, and the word matter represents the information that is used when crafting an opinion or thought. I am not certain if it helps, but the equation would be perspective divided by information. The main problem with the validity of this equation is that the variables involved are always shifting and those variables are decidedly not any type of numbers you can simply calculate.

As convoluted as it may seem to place thought into the realm of mathematics, the truth is that while that idea could sound enraging or flat-out dumb, it is the introduction to a hypothesis that revolves around a rather cliché quote whose English translation is, "I think, therefore I am." – René Descartes.

What you think directly influences your choices and actions, and your choices and actions almost always speak to who you are. Naturally, the mind is never truly as cut and dry as it appears, and even when you exclude things of a medical nature there are still times when people feel like they have no control over what they do, say, or think. Part of why this happens has to do with the mind’s ability to focus on desired information.

The phrase desired information is somewhat of a misnomer. It is better to say that people are just as much creatures of habit in their minds as they are in their daily routines, you see what best fits you. For example, when you compare a pessimist to an optimist who have been given the same information; the pessimist will find something wrong while the optimist will see the good in it.

These opposite points of view underline a psychological filter that dictates the resulting perspective. It does not change the fact that an optimist cannot get sad or that a pessimist cannot be happy. A point of view that is within reason has to do with what the mind first extracts from the information provided, and typically people take that first bit of what they see instead of taking it all in; thus, the mind holds sway over what matters.

The True Secret to Success

I am saying this first because it is something that must be understood; failure is not the opposite of success. Of course, failure like any other negative experience is not pleasant, and I wish I had a better way to say this but failure is something that teaches us.

As practical as it might sound, the idea is to learn from what has not worked and try again is sound advice to a certain extent, but life tends to work differently. No matter what you are trying to accomplish, life has its way of tossing all sorts of things into the mix making it difficult to lockdown what you should focus on.

This is where perspective come into play. Success is a word whose meaning depends on how you interpret it. Yes, there is a finite definition, anyone can look that up, but the interpretation is entirely subjective because its deciding value can be determined by so many different things that it should only be evaluated by the individual who is trying to achieve whatever the specific accomplishment may be.

Anyone can look at another person and simply pick from a list of things that they believe makes someone successful. Things like money, relationships, possessions, donations, reputation, and what they do for a living are facts, but external praise or condemnation is never as important as how an individual sees themself.

If you are honestly unhappy with what you are doing with your life or those goals you have set for yourself are not peaking over the horizon, do not give up or give in. I am sure that I will start to sound like a motivational speaker right now, but part of the power to change whatever it is you want to accomplish is to look toward what can be done instead of what should have been done.

This does not have to be a major shift in how you view the world, and you do not have to be an optimist to do it, I’m not. All that is required is the willingness to accept what you are capable of and something to remind you of where you want to be.

Let me point out that changing how you look at yourself or how you externally view things is not a simple task. It takes a lot of determination or an ever-so-slight dilution to do it. I state it like that because you must reach outside of your comfort zone in order to obtain the changes you need.

One of the many reasons Ex Tenebris exists is for me to step outside of my comfort zone. Growing up, there was one dominating opinion at home, and if you did not act according to the overwhelmingly vocal views of this particular person, your life became unpleasant. The solution my younger self came up with was to not put my thoughts into words and to never show the full potential of anything I could do.

Since those days of my youth, I have put forth the effort to fix that. I found the success I needed by objectively testing and reversing what I thought was necessary behavior. Even if I never accomplish anything else in my life, I know that I have faced the void of self-doubt and ridicule that could have ruled me the rest of my days, and have come out the other side victorious.

The secret to a successful life is that you have the power to determine what you do, and that power comes from two places; eternally and internally. External power acts as a beacon that can guide you to your destination no matter what is in between you and it. Internal power illuminates your soundings, providing you with paths to follow.

Ultimately, it is up to you to decide where you find that power and what you do with it. Choose wisely, you only have one life to live. There are plenty of lights among the darkness, and you should never fear the voids between them. Until next time, I am Nolan… Ex Tenebris.